Ramblings

An Ode To 90s Heartthrob Hair

Recently I stumbled across a binder that symbolized my adolescence–a binder full of photos of my ex-boyfriends. Okay, maybe they were pages torn out of magazines and weren’t really “ex-boyfriends” per say , but I did love 90s teen heartthrobs like they were my own. I mean how could you not with the hair they were sporting back then? In remembrance of my dating past, here is an ode to 90s teen heartthrob hair.

Ah, JTT. My first love. In retrospect, I’m about 8 inches taller than Tim the Toolman Taylor’s son, but back then he was the ultimate dreamboat. I personally paid for the Tiger Beat CEO’s second home with all the magazine’s I bought with JTT on the cover.  I mean look at that hair. He’s got better long hair than I do. He should be in a Pantene Pro V commercial.

JTT

Nick Carter’s hair, defying the laws of physics since the mid-nineties. Unfortunately, my second favorite Backstreet Boy now looks like Ellen Degeneres.

Nick Carter

Whenever I want to complain about having a bad curly hair day, I remember that Ben Savage had a bad curly hair decade. I can see his thought process now, “So, my hair kind of looks like a brillo pad, but you know what would make it better? I’ll take one out of the Justin Timberlake playbook and bleach it blonde. Yeah, that’ll make it cool.”

Ben Savage

Devon Sawa, I must know, what kind of product do you use? How do you get so much lift and body around the face? All I know is that with that hair, you can definitely keep me.

Devon Sawa

Remember Erik Von Detten? He “starred” in the DCOM (Disney Channel Original Movie for those of you that didn’t plan your social calendar around the DCOM TV schedule) Brink!, played Wally Cleaver in the Leave It To Beaver movie, and was Anne Hathaway’s jerk of a crush in The Princess Diaries. Well, I don’t think he washed his hair from 1995-2005. Seriously, check out exhibits A, B, and C. You think he could have used some of the money from his third place finish on Celebrity Mole to buy some shampoo.

Erik Von Detten (4)

I’ll just let Jonathan Jackson’s mullet speak for itself.

Jonathan Jackson

Wait, who am I kidding? Jonathan Jackson’s mullet had to compete on-screen with Andrew Keegan’s layered shag in Camp Nowhere. Plus, Andrew’s locks got to date Al on Step By Step, stand up Steph right before the school dance on Full House, and be the original teen dad on 7th Heaven. It was clearly the hair that won over the leading ladies of 90s sitcoms. As if that wasn’t enough, he an impeccable dresser (we already know how much I love denim shirts).

Andrew Keegan

Jonathan Brandis was a hair chameleon. I mean not every male can pull off a blonde chin length bob like he did in Ladybugs (not many females can either). I tried to pull off chin length hair once… it was a really dark hair period in my life. He makes it look easy.

Jonathan Brandis

Jonathan Brandis-%22Ladybugs%22

By the way, I’ll close this by saying simply this: JTT and his hair are now 31 years old.

-C

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